In Milan, the new bride
emerges from the hotel elevator
without her groom
(he waiting alone by the bar).
She turns her toes toward him,
heels clicking beneath her.
She is stopped by the hand of a man
Placed on the small of her back,
pulling her in to his roiling lips.
She cannot focus on the face at this
angle. He is one of the tour, she knows that.
You're beautiful, he steams
surprised by his own voice.
Her eyes find the floor as
a word surfaces in her mind.
The hand is removed.
He shifts away,
returns to his inebriated wife.
Outside, night.
North African prostitutes
haunt the frigid fields.
By morning,
only stiletto holes
filled with tongues of frost.
Bareness is the word.
bareness.
6 comments:
i remember seeing this one before. i really love it. especially the last two lines.
Like a scene from a 60's movie - dark, in technicolor.
Yes, Megan this is really good. Here's the best part for me: "a word surfaces in her mind" and the last two lines are the slices of bread for the suggestive filling of the intervening lines. That's a really effective device that's clever and seemingly effortless. So for the "her" to get from there to the resolution, she, and the reader, travel through world outside herself. And, of course, the great multiple ambiguities of "bareness". That's really deep and rich. Not sure if that was your conscious intent. Either way, genius.
brilliant piece, Megan, & how real- close to life not like in a reverie!
Jenn: Thank you!
PI: I agree. There is an early 60's feel to it.
Gerry: Thank you. "Bareness" has been worked over many times. It took me a while to find that word, the one that truly surfaces and says what needs to be said. "Emptiness" didn't work.
Smita: Thank you. I wanted a sharpness, a realness that I could expose.
Excellent writing, Megan.
So enjoy how you write!
Margie :)
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